NO PHOTO!!!

This is a disgusting story (hence the lack of photo!) Yesterday when I got home from work, I let the dogs outside. They were out playing and then I heard Bender at the door. Mind you, this is a French door with windows all the way down the face of the door--I can SEE Bender at the door. I can also see that he has his stuffed badger/beaver toy in his mouth. As I am pondering how he (or Zach) got the toy outside without me seeing it, I notice that the tail looks funny to me. It dawned on me in superslow motion that Bender had a real critter, not a stuffed critter. I assessed that the critter was deceased and that it was a RAT!

OK, home alone, two dogs outside with one dead (size 7-and-a-half narrow) rat . Puppy doesn't really know the drop it command. So I tell Bender to "drop" because maybe, somewhere in magic-world, he has mysteriously learned this command. Well, it worked. He dropped the rat--thank God. Then I watched (from safely indoors!) to try and assess if he was planning to pick it up prior to re-entry. The other obsessive-compulsive ideas that ran through my head included the following: 1) what if the rat is not dead? 2) what if Bender kicks it into the house as he comes in? 3) what if the tail flips inside as Bender comes in and, after I slam the door, 1/3 of the rat is in the house? and finally, 4) how do I get Zach to come in and ignore the dead rat across the threshold?

OK, now I have the killer puppy in the house and the big-I-need-to-prove-I-am-top-dog, 85 pound Zach still in the yard with a dead rat between us. I crated Bender (actively avoiding his plentiful puppy kisses at this point) and, with treat in hand, I called Zach to the back door. The rat could have been invisible as far as Zach was concerned. He took the treat and came in the house without so much as a passing glance at the vermin at my door.

Now, two dogs are inside with me and dead rat is outside. I gave both dogs more treats so I could sneak out the door without canine assitance. I used a broom and snow shovel to get rat into trash can. (Sounds like just a few quick steps, but it took longer than it sounds). I had to use the broom to "sweep" the rat into the shovel--rats don't just sweep up like sawdust folks. Then I had to carry the rat in the snow shovel (without really looking at it) and open two gates to get to the driveway without dropping the rat. I also walk with a limp, so this was a bit of a challenge.

With the rat safely in trash, I start trying to figure out how to clean Bender's mouth (there is really nothing one can use that is safe, I was just dreaming up ideas). Then I called the vet. I love calling the vet because they get to ask some of the strangest questions. She asked me if Bender actually killed the rat (presumably to see if he may have been injured in the fracas). I told her that I did not establish a time of death for the rat--I did not touch his little hairy body to establish temperature. I was also able to share that his lifeless body was not frozen (possibly indicating a recent death). There was no obvious blood, but how much blood can you really see from a snow shovel's length away?

I asked her about rabies and she said rats are not common carriers in Ohio. I asked if I needed to bring the rat in for assessment (please do NOT make me crawl into that giant trash can and get the rat back out lady). She indicated that I did not need to do anything more with the rat.

I reminded her that Bender hadn't had his rabies shot and she asked me when he had had the last one. I indicated that he had never had one, he is just a puppy. That's when she finally said, oh, I probably better let you talk to one of the doctors (heh, now there is a really good idea!). I told her that I would like to go ahead and schedule Bender for his first rabies shot (he is just old enough this week). So, I am writing this before we go off to the vet.

I have given Bender lots of water and treats and food to cleanse his palate. I am still not quite ready for puppy kisses, but I am sure that will change here in a week or so!